Friday, July 26, 2013

Nah Nah Nah

Bentley you are 27 1/2 months old, and you fill my heart with happiness.  Over the last two months I have fallen more in love with you than I ever thought possible.  I am able to enjoy your smile, your curious mind, your never ending love for others, and even your occasional tantrums.  You see, I'm ashamed to admit it but up until a couple months ago I feel I was just going through the motions with you.  Just being because I was.  That is playing the roll of a mother and wife but not finding the full enjoyment of being a mother and a wife.  This is difficult to explain to you and for right now we just won't worry about this, because I've been able to overcome this feeling and get past it.
I want to share with you a little about the happenings in your life right now.  You are growing in every way, everyday.  I am never surprised to find you doing something new wither it is the way you are playing with your toys, to what you are capable of understanding.  You currently have begun playing with your vehicles like your airplane, dump truck, bus and train.  You will go and get your people and actually play appropriately with them by putting them in their place and driving them around.  I only wonder what you are thinking when your playing this way.  You LOVE playing outside still, you always have.  You really aren't satisfied unless you get some outside play time in.  Lately you have enjoyed playing in the sprinkler, even with your clothes on.  You still enjoy playing sports however you do not seem as interested in them as you once did.  Hopefully that will change but if it doesn't that will be okay.  Daddy enjoys taking you out on the golf course and you seem to like hitting the golf ball around.  You also enjoy going to the park and the zoo with mommy. 
You have grown in using verbal language also.  Since April you have flourished in this area, however you are still hard to understand most of the time.  Family and those around you often know what you are saying but your still pretty quiet in the public's eye.  You have started to spontaneously say things which you never did in the past.  You still see Missy from AEA who comes out and plays with you and helps develop your language once a month.  You really engage with her and love all the toys she brings for you.  She has seen improvements in the amount of vocalizations you have made since about January/February.  Your speech therapist from Skiff hospital meets with you twice a week since the end of April.  So roughly three months you've been seeing her.  I'm not sure what I can say about her, its been difficult getting you to connect with her.  She seems to have great intentions but struggles with keeping your attention to things.  Recently she has changed one of your goals from learning consonant sounds to dropping back and learning sign language.  I'm having a very difficult time understanding this and agreeing that this is the best option for you.  You have improved everyday with what you communicate to me that its hard to imagine moving backwards.  After this meeting I tried to teach you the sign for no, immediately you began to tell me no, which is one of the few words you say VERY clearly.  After a couple of times you began to sign the word along with saying it and later that night I just was full of tears.  We are meeting with Missy and Amy who is AEA's speech pathologist on Wednesday, you might not go back to Skiff for speech therapy.  Which might not be a bad things.
Today actually a song came on the radio and you began to repeat a couple lines in the lyrics.  It was by far THE MOST ADORABLE thing ever! Song: Blurred Lines Lyrics: Hey Hey Hey, which come out nah, nah, nah.  And you woah after they do in the song as well.  Other things you have and can say spontaneously airplane, race car, daisy, precious, hot dog, more, please, mama, dada, grandma, grandpa, all done, open, wal-mart, snack, outside, I'm pretty sure you say chocolate for when you want chocolate milk however it doesn't even sound close but its consistent with you grabbing the container out of the fridge, there has to be more but I'm not thinking of them right now.  I plan to add to this list as I think of them.  Missy wants me to wright down all the words you say spontaneously I'm super excited to show her the list.      
You eat almost everything, but you are starting to have your dislikes, which I kind of get a kick out of.  You ALWAYS try the food for me, even if it takes some convincing, but the look on your face and how you spit out the food you don't like, it's priceless.  Some that come to mind are, peas and carrots.  It's hilarious, period.  
Potty Training........oh the joys.  It pretty much all started while we were on vacation in Florida in June.  When we had you in the shower after swimming or changing, we would encourage you to go pee, which you would 95% on command.  When we got home we continued the pursuit going as far as buying you undies.  For some reason you like to go pee both in the potty and your undies.  Needless to say, mommy does not quite have the patience for that right now, so I'm failing in the outstanding mother of the year.  We will continue to try but not force anything on you, you'll be ready when your ready.  But you do get super excited when you go potty in your potty chair.  You have even went poo poo ( sorry blog readers, I went there) twice, once with Grandma Cathi and once with Grandma Betty.  I'll try and do better at my part, you just keep up the good work buddy.  
I love you son and I can't wait to see what you will turn out to be.    

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

SWW



  • So what I've completely messed up Bentley's nightly routine because I thought I was doing something good.  He was staying in his room all night so I took the gate down that was across his doorway.......he's been in our bed the last two nights....tonight, he won't go to sleep without Curt in the room.  Mommy FAIL!!!!
  • So what something from my past that came back to my evil brain tonight might have ruined my relationship with my sister in law.  I always seem to do or say something wrong eventually.
  • So what I don't feel support by my husband because of said behavior\ feelings........I guess what they say..family is thicker......oh wait I am his family now....so what he's forgotten that.
  • So what I've decided to do a late late night version of so what, there's a lot on my mind tonight.
  • So what I can't seem to pull the trigger on listing our house on the market, I keep finding reasons to wait.  I guess I just don't like change and the thought of change gives me so much anxiety.
  • So what my son is 2 and can't tell me loves me verbally, he tells me through his eyes everyday. The new speech path wants us to step back from getting sounds out of him and teach him sign language, so what I think she's crazy and just can't bring myself to stop having my son vocalize to me , even though most if what he says we can't understand.....he's getting better everyday!
  • So what I can't keep thinking of what the future holds for him, I'm only human and can't always live for today.
  • So what that lately I've been feeling very alone.....
  • So what I let my son play in the sprinkler with his clothes on while watering my plants.  It's one of my memories as a child getting to jump into our pool of water with our clothes one, it felt so right to do something we think is wrong.
  • So what this version of so what makes me seem whiney, I'm kind of having an off night.  Goodnight everyone hope to get back on this blogger bandwagon soon!